I don’t know how many times I’ve read through it.
Long ago, I felt I had a connection with the shepherd of the village.
Justice, sincerity, and love. But when I think about them, they’re worthless. Everything about them was absolutely laughable.
Every time I had that feeling, there were sudden echoes.
I’m1 being relied on. I’m being relied on.
Lending my ears to those words that I thought to be the sweet whispers of a devil brought my gradual transformation into a monster of reliance.
It’s when you came to realize your own evil that you become desperate to suppress it. In masking it away, others saw it as the truth, and eventually, it became something natural to you that it turned into the truth itself.
I was thrown into an endless loop of doubt as to whether if that’s really all. I could no longer make the distinction on my own.
That’s why, perhaps, I had been waiting for that person who could surely see right through me.
Along the way, I began to sympathize with the evil tyrant king.
“He cannot trust people”, or so.
But anyone knew how the conclusion of the story went.
Just how exactly did the actual end turn out?
The king said, “The heart of man is not to be relied on.”
Did the evil tyrant king, even to this day, still not trust in the existence of that truth and that sincerity?
Was it because he had lost all his trust after trying them and he became unable to rely on them despite their obvious transparency that he thought he wanted to try again by being a part of them, that he wanted to try destroying them?
If your cheeks must be struck as atonement for holding doubt, then who was the person that needed to be struck the most?
I shut the book and looked outside the window.
The sun had already sunk far past the horizon, the final fragment of the afterglow disappearing in succession.
Sincerity. Or perhaps, the truth.
If you couldn’t call those empty delusions, then what else could you call them?
Do genuine things really exist?
|Chapter 8||Top||Chapter 9|
No Longer Human – An excerpt regarding the use of different pronouns on the wiki, make of that what you will:
Ōba refers to himself throughout the book using the reflexive pronoun “Jibun” (自分?), whereas the personal pronoun “Watashi” (私?) is used both in the foreword and afterword to the book by the writer, whose name is unclear. ↩